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J asked:


Everywhere I go I just feel self-conscious and my head really hurts, and I’m just plain uncomfortable. But people say I’m not awkward because then I’d be like *start doing a hunchback of notre dame impression*. Ok so, even if I am normal and not awkward, I still feel it – I feel so horrid I just want to kill myself. It has caused (since being a teenager and I’m currently 17) so much psychological pain it’s unbelievable and I have a burning hatred for myself.

Well, anyway, I know how I act – quiet. I’m just quiet and make no friends due to that. No one notices me at college despite working in a band as the drummer. I also blew every mind in the college when I performed by playing with my teeth in the theatre, but that just goes to show that people only notice my musical talent.

I’m sweet, polite and humble – in other words, a sad loner. This causes suicidal tendencies. I wish I was ordinary. That way, I will have a chance at having a girlfriend, and one day a wife and kids.

Even if I am normal, I still feel terrible everywhere I go. Can I cure this mental awkwardness that no one else has? Or am I just, like some people (e.g. Michael Jackson, Gandhi, Bin Laden……..), a sleepy, quiet and introverted sweetheart, as opposed to your ordinary fun-loving manly hunk you are willing to lose your virginity to?
QUESTION: What is it and can it be cured?

Diana